Living in the moment... One day at a time

Why do we look back or ahead of time instead of focusing on what we can do right now?

Why are we so eager to bring up the past or future... instead of looking at the here and now 

We make plans and we think back on the plans we've made before to say this works for me or this doesn't- We never seem to be in the actual moment of deciding whats right for us and what isnt but still using our knowledge from before - but being able to take a step back and not re live every moment in the past. The future is unknown and we need to do things in the present to lay down the foundation for the future. 

The Daily Grind

I am a city full of people - sometimes I am loud and noisy like on a busy street -
other times I am as quiet and peaceful like the wind rushing through the trees.

I am at times Dark and rainy other times - I am Bright and sunny

The daily Grind Can bring you down the daily grind can also bring you up

People who you learn live and laugh- People who are all around just evil

The Daily grind can seem like just another day- but its small moments and small words of wisdom that make the biggest difference.

:-)

How to reach those dreams

Small steps for me to take everyday to better myself and reach those dreams would be -
Going for walks with my dog, studying, eating right and looking for a new apartment knowing that my children will come to me when they are old enough I am able to focus on building a foundation where one day we can live as a family in the house by the lake I always dream about. :)

My dreams

I have big plans in my life by 26 I plan to loose more weight.
I wanna see my children again and gain a relationship from them.
Have a wonderful job and a wonderful place to live.
I'd love to live on the beach and here the waves crashing every morning and night
I hope I have a supportive and caring husband who loves me very much and  doesent make me lose trust in him.
I'd like to limit my stress to a minimum.
Id love to travel to my home country Romania
Meet my mother and father from Romania
Have enough money to live off of

5 things I want for my house

Lots of windows
front /backyard
3 bedroom house
2 story
on a quiet residential neighborhood

My mentor

My mentor is my mother Elaine, even though we don't always see eye to eye its the fact she doesn't want me to give up and see me fail at life, she knows when I'm trying and when I'm not and her words during tough times. The funny thing is her words are always with me even when we haven't officially talked in years - things like - The choices you make whether they are good or bad will affect you - or Get your education and a job for yourself, never let a man be the one who has the control in case something happens you need to rely on yourself.
its with these types of sayings that keep me level and grounded and although my mom and I aren't talking I know she would be proud of the steps I have taken :)

Finding a mentor

I have a few good friends who are older and wiser and overall have a lot of experience  in life having themselves  gone thought the same issues as a younger person - their guidance prevents you from making the same mistakes. The right mentor will never steer you in the wrong direction. :)

New skills and opportunities

I'd like to travel to Romania to meet my mother
learn the language or the Roma people
Meet my children and continue my education in order to become an office administrator.
I'd like to talk to my mother that had adopted me and become better friends again.
I want to get married and have 2 more (beautiful) children and find a house and grow old in that house <3

Steps I can take today!!!

1. Exercise - not just good for loosing weight but also to destress
2. Being an active listener so my friends and family know I care about what they say
3. Go to church and get involved
4.Finnish Highschool
5. work on resume

Its not impossible...its just difficult

For me - After having my second child the weight just stuck to me... I'm finding now that I have alot more energy and have the urge to drink smoothies for my food so far I've lost 8lbs this month thus far  meaning my over all average for wieght loss is improving from 3 years ago id average loosing  around 5 lbs a month without added exercise - I am finding eating the right foods/ right portion of food your body can properly decide what energy to store and what energy to use  which means in 2 months time rather thhan loosing 10 lbs a month I am closer to 20lbs a month doing what I know is right for my body :)

My footprint

When I do pass on I hope that my life was very fulfilling - for me that would mean meeting my children first and foremost, getting good grades in college- getting a job in my field of study - maybe have a husband and 2 more children settling down and visiting Romania to meet my biological family :) Money is not a factor for me as a foot print although I would very much like to leave money for my little ones education I want the world to know I love my children and if I were to die I'd be happiest with the knowledge theyre happy  safe and well loved

Am I positive

I believe I am a positive person my philosophy has always been to treat people the way they wish to be treated. Because I have been hurt before and only had myself to blame as I had mistreated someone.

Howdo you talk to yourself

I tell myself at times Calm down! live in the moment!!!! Having some fear is good but when you are so affraid the fear alone clouds your judgement where the inner voice is hardly heard this is a problem because its the inner the good inner voice we need to listen to - the inner voice that says - its not that bad/ it will get better :)

Going to church

I have been going to chruch on a more regular basis- which makes me feel spiritually well  inside and believing in God because I believe I am here for a purpose- I know this is true because of the many times I have made mistakes that have ended up showing me that this is not the way - there is a plan for me :)

How I see myself

I am not perfect- but i keep trying to better my life and surroundings. There is alot about this world that I dislike but there are few people who make this world worth living for. I see myself as imperfect because I have made mistakes - I see the world as both good and bad because of experiences not all were good but not all were bad either

Simply breathe in and out

What do you see when you close your eyes*

I see dark waves moving toward the cold sand - crashing waves off in the distance the smell of the beach and the smell of the night thick with dew and twinkling lights from the stars and moon fill the sky - thinking about going camping again :)

My Philosophy

I believe I am a positive person, My philosophy hasnt changed from what I was taught as a little girl - To treat people the same way you wish to be treated.
Ive found my philosophy is the same as ever and its now more than ever I wont give into being a mean person to simply get ahead.

How I talk to myself

I tell myself at times calm down live in the moment stop rushing things or fearing to do anything as I do is very difficult at times I tell myself some fear is good but when you are so afraid the fear alone clouds your judgement.

How do i see myself and the world

I see that I am still young and I make mistakes like anyone else, I also know not to get upset at myself when i do make errors- I know that errors are just natures way of saying - NOPE - lol I feel as though my sense of hummour plays big role in my overall attitude

My feelings towards the world is mutual there are good and bad people in this world and those bad people may have their own problems to begin with- I know that nothing is perfect and having that understanding and acceptance works for me

Sucess starts with little steps

Think of 3 things that you can do to help you lead to success.

Finnish high school.
Look for a 2 bedroom.
Co-op and office administration program at Canadore college.

If I could do anything no matter how outrageous

I would like to travel to Romania.
I would like to meet my mother/ family.
I would like to become a secretary.
I would like to have a nice house.\
I would like to have my children live with me in that house.

What I love to do

I love to sing.
I love to dance.
I love to spend time with friends and family.
I love to go to the movies.
I love to listen to music and write out the lyrics. 

Finding what works for me...

Hi guys, well funny enough usually this is never a problem for me, but the other night I was
unable to get to sleep as quickly as I would have liked.
what was my trick?
I put on music to help me fall asleep funny enough words within the song had hit closer to home than expected
 "when a door closes one another opens but its hard to let go when your hearts broken."
"I hope you'll still be there to pick the pieces up." "Cause baby I'm fragile."
with its soothing yet uplifting music .

the funny thing is that I had to listen to the same song a few times in order for my brain to calm down and say everything you needed to say / write has been said no point overthinking
and within 10 minutes of thinking it over I managed to get to sleep -

This was a positive step for me to not just overlook my ill feelings - Its better to go to sleep without anxiety and sadness to overcome and happening upon the song before bed was really a happy accident - No matter- I am grateful for this mans song!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alrwZokqfVY

5 things I'm good at

1.I am good to work on my own, at times, I'd prefer it.
2.I am good at day dreaming and over all getting lost in thought.
3.I am good at caring for others when I know someone cant care for themselves
4.I am good at working on my assignments and seeing deeper meaning and truth to lessons.
5. I am good at cooking and making something delicious for big crowds of people :)

Putting the REAL in Realationships

I have a boyfriend far away I grant you- who is masturbating to other women online through porn sites - I was very hurt when he said he was still doing it
because I had not done that and to me its disgusting  we were trying to make things work and he was fantasising with other women I asked how could he do that to me and why would he think that would be acceptable to me if were trying to make things work - Its no better than cheating -
He said well its just porn - as if that little bit of information had somehow escaped my imagination - ya I know it is and regardless I feel as though its a breach in trust and that if u want to fantasize about other people your better off being single

If your unhappy with your partner when you go outside the relationship to seek gratification then that is considered cheating and in no way should a woman put up with that because its just the times were living in!
We as women need to say no- I don't appreciate you looking at other women when your in a relationship with me!!!


please look at this -
http://www.fightthenewdrug.org/get-the-facts/?gclid=CjwKEAiAjfq2BRDpmdHmssaW5xsSJABToP4lLvbLSQ0HQw8BWfB09w4QuKGxj8Vx4cRvomjENgtPaRoCYuvw_wcB#relationships/porn-kills-love

I don't care, said Pierre,I'm from France

When I was watching an episode of south park one day I found it quite funny that Cartman in the end lost everything and when complaining to the owner the man turns to him and says - I don't care said Pierre I'm from France . It made me laugh pretty hard as that was basically the end of the South Park episode which I found even more interesting - usually Stan or Kyle have a moral to a story before the end of every episode as part of a conclusion but in this case - im guessing we are to make up our own conclusion that bad things happen to people which seems to be in turns and in the end Cartman got what he deserved :) 

Getting well

I am a 25 year old woman who just recently broke up with my boyfriend.
Well unfortunately- Doctors had found some blood and proteins in my urine, so when I had found out it was pelvic inflammatory disease I was very worried and over all never quite heard of this disease.
Well it can affect anyone but is more common with women who have previously been pregnant- where I became the target, bacteria gets trapped behind the cervix and can leave a woman sterile.

This is the 4th day from recovering this terrible illness and one can only imagine the repercussion this illness might have on someone who doesn't get checked regularly -

This means   everyone should go out and get tested!

Getting out of an old relationship, get tested
If you change partners and don't use a condom get tested
If you think you might have something get tested/ treated.

You are hurting yourself and others by spreading these diseases knowingly or unknowingly
*these are serious illnesses. Effects may vary

call 705 474 1400
make an appointment today

When the chips are down

I am someone with depression.....

this depression I have had since I was a young child 

I have recently found out that people will go through spurts of depression 

Its actually a normal part of life to be upset and get down - sometimes for weeks at a time .

But getting too comfortable in the depression is sometimes the problem for alot of people including myself ....
I have been on many different types of medications to try and put an end to feeling so down - 

but the truth is, the medication kept me dependant and did not teach me tools to learn to cope without.

My tricks are ....

1 stay in the moment 

2 do things you love doing 

3 dont give up - tomorrow is most deffenitly another day 

4 journal (alot of my depression I found out was from deep routed problems) 

5 get involved (groups, activities, social events-) 

DO NOT ISSOLATE - This has got to be one of the worst things people as a whole can do - 

because social stimulation is a need just like any other needs 

 If the cause of the depression is to do with certain people - keep your distance

one does not need any added stress 

Just know for anyone reading this - It does get better and you can count on me as a friend 

if you have a story about depression youd like to share with me you can at...

anna_larose@hotmail.com  or 

Anna Elizabeth Larose  //Facebook 

ThLrtkF"beut'tt

 

 

 

Success and what it means to me....
For me success are goals Ive made and have had followed through on.

Id like to learn Romanian, Id like to visit Romania again, I d like to re visit the place I was born.I’d like to have my school all done and be graduated – id like to become a office administrative co ordinate – Id like to meet my children in the future and see what kind of wonderful people they’ve become and start a painting group in the community.

To get to this –

 I will learn Romanian and practice as much as possible

I will keep an open mind about meeting my children and wait to see if they do end up looking for me

I will finish high school.

And sign up for office administration as soon as possible.

Once I make enough money per year I can go to Romania and re connect with my routes.

 

I define shaping my life into something I am proud of as success and having followed these simple steps is very much attainable.

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Here I am learning to use blogspot again :P